Style This Challenge: Sequin Diaper

We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming to discuss a pressing fashion emergency.  The Mom Edit points out a pretty neat sale at French Connection: 50% off already reduced items with the code 50Sale.

Not bad, right?   Even though I’m pretty set on my shirts, I decided to poke around.  Plenty of cute stuff, the sort of edgy basics that I like.

But then I stumbled on this:

That’s right.  I can only describe this as a sequined diaper.  French Connection calls it the “Cosmic Sparkle Short.”  I will agree, they are definitely far out.  Out of this world.  From another planet.  OK, I’ll stop.

But seriously, when would you wear these?  How would you wear these?  Even pretending I was a fabulous young thing and not a mother of two–even one who loves her some skinny jeans, what situations in my life would make me think, “you know what would really work here?  My sequin diaper.”

French Connection suggests to “Channel a vintage gymnast look and pair our sequinned Cosmic Sparkle Hot Pants with woolly tights and a fluffy knit.”  I guess it would have to be a short fluffy knit so you could still see the using-this-term-loosely “shorts.”

Maybe these could look edgy under a sheer dress?  Even with tights under, I just have a hard time picturing them standing alone.  Remember the epidemic of “whoops, she forgot her pants” in Hollywood?  I feel like–for better or for worse–leggings as pants are now more accepted.  I haven’t seen as much pearl clutching on this one.  But I have not see sequin diaper as pants being an accepted phenomenon.  Is this a bridge too far?

I love that fashion feels more fun now.  I don’t know if it is style bloggers or cheaper fashion or what, but it seems like things that used to be completely fashion verboten are now complete non-issues.  It feels admittedly silly to type this, but growing up I used to be physically pained at the idea of mixing black and brown.  I once saw a black and brown and navy dress and thought it was one of the most awful things I had ever seen.  Now I wear a camel colored purse every day without even glancing at my (probably black) shoes because they both are just neutrals.  Why wouldn’t they go together?  You know what else I now consider neutrals?  Camouflage.  Stripes.  Floral.  We all have our sartorial threshold, but you have to admit fashion is just more fun now, right?

Fun enough for a sequin diaper?  I guess we shall see.  I couldn’t rock this one, but if you are fabulous enough to do so, I say more power to ya!  (Could you please direct me to your instagram feed?  I imagine you must have photos there of you, stroking a liger, sipping flaming martinis, on a yacht that is circling someone’s private island.)  I have found myself eying sequin leggings recently.  If sequin diapers catch on, sequin leggings will be totally accepted daily momwear, right?

Would you sequin diaper?  If forced to wear a sequin diaper, how would you style it?  Do you agree that fashion is more fun than the shoes-match-purse feelings of yore?

4 thoughts on “Style This Challenge: Sequin Diaper

  1. maggie says:

    Might I recommend them under a short skirt? If we could get Hollywood on board, it would make those horrible up-skirt-while-exiting-car tabloid shots both more stylish and less problematic.

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