My kids say some pretty hilarious things.  I’ve been told that I used to say hilarious things once, but my parents didn’t write it down and cannot remember even one witty anecdote.  Inspired by YHL’s Clara Conversations, I wanted to share some isms as I collect a critical mass.

Me: How did you sleep? Did you like the new pillow?
Mac: Yes, but it has jellybeans inside it.
That’s not quite what a gel pillow is . . .

Henry: (looking at family photos) Are they going on a safari?
Me: Uh, no. They’re going to a football game.
Modern day safari?

Me: I do love you weird beards.
Mac: (cheekily) Even when we bite our fingernails?
It really is an epidemic around here. We’ve started wearing gloves when reading books and watching TV. They just can’t stop.

Henry: (after being woken up to catch an early flight) Did you know I was dreaming? You broke my dream.

Me: (At Disney Land Hong Kong) They need more kid volunteers for the Star Wars show. Do you want to do it?
Mac: No.
Me: Are you sure? You don’t want to get on stage and fight Darth Vader with a lightsaber?
Mac: Do I get to keep the lightsaber?
Me: No.
Mac: Then no.

Mac: I’m Wonder Woman riding a motorcycle!
Me: I thought Captain America had the motorcycle.
Mac: She took it from him.
Me: She took it? I thought they were on the same team?
Mac: NO. She’s DC and he’s Marvel.

Henry: What’s that good smell?
Me: We’re having Greek chicken with eggplant.
Henry: (blank look)
Me: Greece is where Hercules was from.
Henry: Hercules! I’m going to tell Mac we’re having Hercules chicken! (runs out of kitchen)
Mac: Aw, man, it has Hercules germs on it.
Henry: Hercules blew all over it.
My little gourmands . . .

Psst.  Want more hilarity?  Check it out here.