My kids say some pretty hilarious things.  I’ve been told that I used to say hilarious things once, but my parents didn’t write it down and cannot remember even one witty anecdote.  Inspired by YHL’s Clara Conversations, I wanted to share some isms as I collect a critical mass.

Henry:  Drive closer. All I want is to chop down the lights.
James: It’s all you want?
Me: How would you chop them down?
Henry: With an ax.
Me: Do you have an ax?
Henry: I have a MAGIC ax. (Raises hand.) Magic Ax, TO ME. Huh, I guess I don’t have a magic ax.

Mac: I love the smell of your skin.
Me: Aww.
Mac:  Can you serve your skin for lunch?
CREEPY.

Mac: Rudolph the red nose reindeer, had a very shiny poop. And if you ever would saw it, you would cry like a baby.

Henry: (while he’s supposed to be sleeping)  ALEXA, fire some morblords. ALEXA, fire Daddy from work! ALEXA, fire Mommy from work. ALEXA, fire Mac from work. ALEXA, fire everybody but me!
We don’t even have an Amazon Echo . . .

Mac: Look, marmalades!
They were mermaids.

Mac: (Closing James’s button up shirt that is gaping as he bends over.) Nobody wants to see that.
That was way harsh, Mac.

Psst.  Want more hilarity?  Check it out here.